In this candid Q&A, a parent of three shares her deeply personal journey of recognising early signs of autism, seeking support, and finding answers and an autism diagnosis through ISLTS. Her story is one of intuition, determination, and hope – offering reassurance to other families who may be at the start of their own journey.
When did you first start to wonder if your child might be autistic?
“You’ll know in your gut if something isn’t right with your child. I noticed my child was going backwards, not forwards.”
With my first child, A, I began noticing changes around the age of two. At one, everything seemed fine and developmentally, things were going well. But by two, I felt like we were going backwards rather than forwards. I couldn’t understand why, and when I reached out for support, I was told to wait until the 2.5-year check. I was angry and frustrated as I knew something wasn’t right.
My parents always told me: “You’ll know in your gut if something isn’t right with your child.” That stuck with me. So I started researching, typing the behaviours I was seeing into Google, and that’s when I came across Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD).
Watching neurotypical children play, talk and explore while my child didn’t was heartbreaking. I found myself questioning if I was doing something wrong.
With Child B, the signs were similar but started even younger. After a difficult birth, I thought perhaps that was the cause. I tried more sensory play, messy play and outings, but these made things harder. She hated bright lights, shops and crowds, becoming extremely dysregulated whenever we went out.
Then came Child C. Her signs were more subtle at first, she developed well until around age two, then began to regress. She needed glasses, but other difficulties remained: distress around other children, trouble initiating play, and sensitivity to noise. She wore ear defenders most days and lined up her toys perfectly and any change upset her deeply.
What behaviours made you decide to seek an autism diagnosis?
“It wasn’t just what they did – it was what they didn’t do.”
Some of the behaviours I noticed wouldn’t have been obvious to others, but as a parent, I could see them clearly.
I began to notice that my children often:
- Became angry or distressed around other people
- Avoided eye contact
- Struggled to communicate through speech
- Frequently stimmed with their hands or feet
- Were extremely selective with food
- Found messy play overwhelming and became dysregulated
- Struggled to sit still
- Lined up toys or objects in neat, precise rows
- Didn’t always respond when their names were called
Across all three of my children, I also saw patterns such as:
- Limited interest in group activities or new experiences
- Repetition – the same games, the same shows, and resistance to change
- Difficulty coping with anything unfamiliar or out of routine
Although they share similarities as siblings, each child’s challenges looked different:
- Child A – Stimmed constantly and became easily overwhelmed.
- Child B – Found speech and communication very difficult and became distressed in unfamiliar settings.
- Child C – Began to regress in learning and focus, became anxious with any change, and often lined up every toy or object she could find.
As their Mum, I could see these signs even when others couldn’t. Each small behaviour pointed to something deeper and that’s when I knew it was time to seek answers.
Did you try the NHS route first? What made you choose a private autism diagnosis?
“Booking with ISLTS was the best decision I’ve ever made for my children”
Yes. After the 2.5-year review, delays were noted, and we were referred for vision and hearing checks. Deep down, I already knew what it was. After months of waiting, we saw a paediatrician who referred us to Neurodevelopmental Services.
Then came the letter telling us the waiting list was over three years. That was the breaking point. I’d followed every step, but my child needed help now.
That’s when I found ISLTS. I saved every penny, went without, and my parents helped too. Some people said: “She just needs a nursery.” But that didn’t help, she couldn’t communicate when she was hurt or distressed.
What would you say to other parents who feel anxious about starting this process?
“You plant the seed; the right help is the water they need to grow.”
This is your child, if you want to act, do it. You know them better than anyone.
Reach out and talk to others. You may feel alone, but you’re not. Navigating a neurodiverse world is emotional and exhausting but so rewarding.
Be careful where you go for private assessments. Not every autism diagnosis is recognised, but ISLTS are HCPC-registered and NICE-compliant. From day one, I felt heard and supported. For the first time, someone truly listened.
Getting a private diagnosis changed our lives. The fight for support became so much easier.
What difference has getting an autism diagnosis made for you and your family?
“When we got the diagnosis, I could finally breathe.”
Even though I already suspected autism, the diagnosis made everything real. I finally understood my children – why they reacted as they did and how best to support them.
It gave me confidence to advocate for them and educate others. I can proudly say: “My children are neurodiverse and that’s something to celebrate.”
We can now plan outings, prepare for challenges, and ensure our children have what they need. My parents, too, have learned and adapted. They’ve made small changes to help and seeing my children happy and included means everything.
What advice would you give to families just beginning this journey?
“You are your child’s voice – don’t let anyone silence it.”
Here’s what I’ve learned along the way:
- Trust your instincts. You know your child best.
- Do your research. Knowledge is power.
- Never give up. The system is hard, but persistence matters.
- Connect with others. Attend SEND events and learn from other parents.
- Seek help. Don’t be ashamed; everyone needs support.
- If you go private – ensure they’re HCPC-registered and NICE-compliant.
- Your feelings are valid. It’s okay to struggle, you’re doing great.
- Stand tall. Don’t let specialists talk over you, you know your child.
- Fight for the diagnosis. It truly makes a difference.
- Be proud. You’re doing an amazing job, even on the hardest days.
How would you describe your experience with ISLTS?
Each time, and I’ve been through this three times now, ISLTS made me feel heard and supported. Every step was explained clearly, and I was treated with compassion and respect.
The team was warm, empathetic and professional. It never felt clinical or rushed – it felt human. ISLTS reassured me that we were doing the right thing, offered ongoing support, and made sure that I knew we weren’t alone.
It’s a lovely, welcoming place, and I’ll always be grateful for how they treated not just my children but me, as a parent.
Get the Right Support
At ISLTS, we understand that every family’s journey is unique. Our experienced clinicians provide clear, compassionate autism assessments designed to help families move forward with confidence and understanding.
If you’re beginning to ask yourself: “Could my child be autistic?” – you’re not alone. We’re here to listen, guide, and support you every step of the way.
